Christian Borle, Andrew Rannells - The Chess Game

[MARVIN]

That's the king. Treat him nice

Use some brains; now protect him


[WHIZZER]

Yes, I know. Here I go


[MARVIN]

Play the game


[WHIZZER]

Please, don't watch me

I can do it!


[MARVIN]

Have a little scotch


[WHIZZER]

Shit, I blew it

Maybe you could show me where

I fear

I've lost my head


[MARVIN]

Do you want my help?


[WHIZZER]

No, I don't

I can think it through myself


[MARVIN]

Start again. We've seen the worst


[WHIZZER]

I'll go first


[MARVIN]

Move a pawn


[WHIZZER]

No, sir


[MARVIN]

Move


[WHIZZER]

Where?


[MARVIN]

There


[WHIZZER]

Here?


[MARVIN]

Move a pawn


[WHIZZER]

Who?


[MARVIN]

Not the queen


[WHIZZER]

Who?


[MARVIN]

Jesus


[MARVIN AND WHIZZER]

Life's a sham and

Every move is wrong

We've examined

Every more as we move along


[MARVIN]

Winning is everything to me


[WHIZZER]

Nothing is everything to me


[MARVIN]

Winning is everything to me


[WHIZZER]

Nothing is everything to me

Except sex...


[MARVIN]

Move the pawn


[WHIZZER]

And money


[MARVIN]

Good first move


[WHIZZER]

Quite alright

Take a turn


[MARVIN]

Thank you kindly


[WHIZZER]

Move the pawn

Move the pawn

Take my hand

Play the game


[MARVIN]

God you're pretty


[WHIZZER]

Ah, more's the pity

Since you need a man...


[MARVIN]

What?


[WHIZZER]

Who's brainy...


[MARVIN]

Or...


[MARVIN AND WHIZZER]

Witty


[MARVIN]

Move


[WHIZZER]

What should I do now?


[MARVIN]

Move


[WHIZZER]

Where?


[MARVIN]

There


[WHIZZER]

How should I behave myself?

Maybe we should call it quits


[MARVIN]

This game shits


[WHIZZER]

Let me win


[MARVIN]

Yes, sir


[WHIZZER]

Please


[MARVIN]

Yes


[WHIZZER]

Thanks


[MARVIN]

Wait!


[WHIZZER]

Whizzer wins!


[MARVIN]

Wait!


[WHIZZER]

Whizzer wins!


[MARVIN]

Wait!


[WHIZZER]

Checkmate!


[MARVIN AND WHIZZER]

Life's a sham and every move is wrong

We've examined every move as we move along


[WHIZZER]

What?

Marvin...!

Whizzer's supposed to make the dinner

Be a patsy, loose at chess

Always bravely acquiesce

Clip the coupons, make the dinner

And love him

This has got to come to a stop, Marvin


[MARVIN]

This had got to come to a stop, Whizzer


[WHIZZER]

This has been a lousy but


[WHIZZER AND MARVIN]

Fabulous flop


[MARVIN]

Anyone understand?

All I want's a kiss

Anyone understand?


[WHIZZER]

Don't start explaining

I'm sick of explaining


(MARVIN) AND [WHIZZER]

And this had better come to a stop

(Whizzer) [Marvin]

Now, (Whizzer) [Marvin]

Ciao, (Whizzer) [Marvin]

Bend

This had better come

This had better come to a

This, this, this, this


[WHIZZER]

This had better come to an end


[MARVIN]

This had better come to an end


[MARVIN AND WHIZZER]

This had better come to an end