Ben Folds Five - Uncle Walter (Live At Kool Haus, Toronto, Canada 10/5/12)

Your Uncle Walter's going on
and on
Bout everything he's seen and
done
The voice of 50 years experience
He's drunk watching the
television
You know he's been around the
world
Last night he flew to Baghdad
In his magical armchair
Cigarettes and a six pack he
just got back
Now the spit's flying everywhere
Hey hey hey hey Your Uncle
Walter's going on and on
You're back so late Where did
you go that you were gone so long
How could you leave me here so
long with Uncle Walter
Your Uncle Walter saw who fired
the shots
He drove his chair in the
cavalcade
He's flown from South Africa
To countries where
They beat themselves on the
backs with chains
There was a fleet of battleships
And 1 reclining chair
Headed north on the Arabian Sea
Now he's back to tell us what
He and his oldest boy Blair
They're getting rich with their
mail order scheme
Oh oh Your Uncle Walter's
going on and on
We're so glad you're home Where
did you go that you were gone so
long
How could you leave me here so
long with Uncle Walter
Your Uncle Walter told me
Everything he'd do if he was
president
Oh what a perfect world
This world would be
If he was President now
But he's not
And he sees the children smoking
pot
He knows that in a moment
They'll be shooting up heroin
Teardrops in his armchair
A 50 minute lecture
Tobacco juice rolling down his
chin
Hey hey hey hey Your Uncle
Walter's going on and on
You're back so late Where did
you go that you were gone so long
How could you leave me here so
long with Uncle Walter
Your Uncle Walter's going on
and on
Bout everything he's seen and
done
The voice of 50 years experience
He's drunk watching the
television
You know he's been around the
world
Last night he flew to Baghdad
In his magical armchair
Cigarettes and a six pack he
just got back
Now the spit's flying everywhere
Hey hey hey hey Your Uncle
Walter's going on and on
You're back so late Where did
you go that you were gone so long
How could you leave me here so
long with Uncle Walter
Your Uncle Walter saw who fired
the shots
He drove his chair in the
cavalcade
He's flown from South Africa
To countries where
They beat themselves on the
backs with chains
There was a fleet of battleships
And 1 reclining chair
Headed north on the Arabian Sea
Now he's back to tell us what
He and his oldest boy Blair
They're getting rich with their
mail order scheme
Oh oh Your Uncle Walter's
going on and on
We're so glad you're home Where
did you go that you were gone so
long
How could you leave me here so
long with Uncle Walter
Your Uncle Walter told me
Everything he'd do if he was
president
Oh what a perfect world
This world would be
If he was President now
But he's not
And he sees the children smoking
pot
He knows that in a moment
They'll be shooting up heroin
Teardrops in his armchair
A 50 minute lecture
Tobacco juice rolling down his
chin
Hey hey hey hey Your Uncle
Walter's going on and on
You're back so late Where did
you go that you were gone so long
How could you leave me here so
long with Uncle Walter
Selfless, Cold, and Composed -- Ben Folds Five

Ben Folds Five live in Boston, MA at the House of Blues on October 13, 2012. "Selfless, Cold, and Composed" is one of my personal all-time favorite songs -- not ...

Ben Folds Five

Ben Folds Five