Original Broadway Cast - Jason`s Bar Mitzvah

[JASON]

Whizzer, hey!

Suddenly it all came clear

I said, let's have my bar mitzvah here!

[MARVIN, TRINA, MENDEL, JASON, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA]

Surprise!

[MARVIN]

This was Jason's brilliant idea!

And I brought the prayer shall

[MARVIN, TRINA, MENDEL, JASON, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA]

Ooo

It's Jason's bar mitzvah!

[MENDEL]

Don't you move

Everything will soon be great

Close your eyes

While we redecorate

[CORDELIA]

I'll unwrap the billion hors d'oeuvres

And someone, please, eat them

[TRINA]

Photo

[ALL]

Ooo

It's Jason's bar mitzvah!

[TRINA]

Lovely, flowers make things lovely

Champagne makes things lovely, too

Everything's amiss

[MENDEL]

Drink up!

Anyone for bubbly?

[TRINA]

Probably, it's doubly

Useful at a time like this

Cheers

[MENDEL AND WHIZZER]

Cheers

[TRINA]

And aren't things lovely?

I feel more helpless than I have in years

[MARVIN]

Try this on

Mendel, get this thing in gear

[WHIZZER]

Please excuse me

If I interfere

But I feel that, since I'm the host

It's me who should toast him

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, TRINA, MENDEL, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA]

Ooo, ooo

[WHIZZER]

To Jason's bar mitzvah!

[CHARLOTTE]

I notified the nurses

Told them please to not intrude

[CORDELIA]

I passed around the food

And dumped some extra food

'Cause, Lord knows, we've got plenty

[CHARLOTTE]

She's cooked for some 200 guests

[CORDELIA]

We number not that many

Actually..., we're seven

[CHARLOTTE]

Maybe it's not dumb

The way this whole thing ends

The food tastes really yummy

[CORDELIA]

Oh, mummy

[TRINA]

Lovely

[CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA]

The flowers seem to sparkle

The candelabra sets the tone

[TRINA]

I must make things

[CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA]

The wine is very soothing

[TRINA]

Lovely

[CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA]

Soothes the "something, something"

Someone needed soothing

[TRINA]

Put everything

[CHARLOTTE]

I think, perhaps, I'm overdressed

[TRINA]

In its place

[CORDELIA]

I think, perhaps, it doesn't matter

[TRINA]

Ready for the

[CORDELIA]

That you are

[TRINA]

Band

[CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA]

Here we are

Jason's bar mitzvah looks

Like the books

Say it should

[TRINA, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA]

Cheers

[TRINA]

And aren't things lovely?

[CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA]

Everything is lovely

[TRINA, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA]

I feel more helpless than I have in years

[MENDEL AND WHIZZER]

Here he comes

[MENDEL]

Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun

Fix his tie

Trina, try

To make him smile more

[WHIZZER, TRINA, MENDEL, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA]

Don't know why

But he looks like Marvin

[MARVIN]

How did you turn out so great?

Who do I thank for the man you've turned into?

Kid, do you know

How proud I am?

If I don't show

How proud I am...

You hold my dreams

Kid, I burst at the seams

'Cause of you

[MENDEL]

Son of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob

Son of Marvin, Son of Trina, Son of Whizzer, Son of Mendel

[MARVIN, WHIZZER, TRINA, JASON, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA]

And godchild to the lesbians from next door

[MENDEL]

Sing

Oh, sing

Oh, sing

[JASON]

Vie-eme-low yea-o-leh

Heh-oh-non vi-low

Ah-yis-is-ooh ay-ysi-ro-ale

Ha-ooh low toe vo-o-meem aboh

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